Tuesday, October 7, 2014

Hands Free Mama

Okay so do I mean this type of "Hands Free"? ….not exactly. 

Here is the cover of an amazing book I read this summer...

I want to be the best mom I can be, so this book seemed to be a relevant/interesting read based on the cover, and could possibly give me some tips for this journey called motherhood. One of the first pages had this pledge….

I initially thought this book was all about getting rid of devices, but it was so much more. Many things jumped out to me... had me crying, thinking, taking notes, rereading. It just made sense. The premise of the book is all about being "present" which I'm finding in today's world is becoming a problem. I want to be present for my kids, my family, my friends. 

"If you constantly feel your attention being averted from what really matters to the insignificant and meaningless details of your life, then you might be familiar with The Disease of Distraction."

Hmm.. interesting…
Here are some highlights and how I am totes guilts of what this book was all about:

*One story Rachel (the author) told, was how her daughters REALLY wanted to go swimming on Mother's Day. This was not her idea of how this day would pan out, and after all, FINALLY, a day where a mom can be selfish and do things she wants to do without feeling guilty about putting her needs first. Rachel described how she didn't really enjoy swimming, and if and when she did go, she hated getting her hair wet. I totally agree. The many times I took Samuel in our pool this summer, I didn't go under. Ugh, chlorine hair + sun = nightmare. One day this summer I had a sitter come to the house, and she got her hair wet. This was the first thing Samuel told me when I came home. "We went swimming, and we BOTH went under!" Guilt surged through my body. This small thing that I repeatedly avoided, was his highlight while I was away.

We spend a lot of time under water in the pool now. :) I just go to bed with pool head! I mean the belly laughs I get from Samuel when I go under and "George Washington" my hair are worth every split end that results from our pool day. 

"Being spontaneous and playful created a tangible connection to my children that simply observing them did not." 

I am totally guilty of this one… "watching" Samuel play with his monster trucks, train set, Play-Doh, kitchen, you name it… and not "engaging" in the play… because I'm.. making dinner, picking up, trying to fold five towels real quick, cleaning up a spill, answering a text, you name it. Rachel talked about a time it was raining and she allowed her kids to play in the rain, and she joined them. Wow. What a memory she created for her kids.

So last week, as I'm four weeks out from having a baby… Jonah is sleeping, FINALLY (that's a whole other blog post) in his swing for a few hours. 4-7:30 P.M. to be exact. It was one of those beautiful fall days we've been having. Samuel wanted to play in his sprinkler. Translation…ugh, I have to dig it out of the toy bin, hook it up to the hose, it's going to fall over 25 times. Sounds awful. Then I thought..what if I play with him?  Um, because Jonah is sleeping, I just had a baby, my uterus will fall out, should I keep going? But I thought, I could create a memory for Samuel. We could tell dad how we BOTH played in the sprinkler today; doing our best Spiderman jumps over the water. 
Yes we both got wet, grass was all over our feet, which we tracked in the house, but it was a fun time. #uterusdidnotfallout
He still talks about that "silly" day. 

"XO before you go"

There have been many mornings, and I'm sure there will continue to be…
"Josh do you have money to pay the sitter? What do you want for dinner? Did Samuel pee in his pull-up last night?" Literally a 20-minute conversation smashed into two minutes, as we are both walking out the door. How many times do I blow kisses to my husband and baby, shout, "I love you; have a good day," and fly out the door? This whole "XO before you go" is sweet. Make the time to give a sufficient hug and kiss before you go. Maybe that means waking up five minutes earlier, or not putting on as much makeup, or something. I know typing this sounds easier than in the moment, but I really like the idea. I never want my family to feel as though I'm too rushed or busy to show them affection. #heartbreaking

The last quote from the book I love is: 

"Choosing connection over distraction offers you a chance to nuture your most sacred relationships-now and in the future. I cannot think of a better use of your precious time, can you?


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